Hello Kiddies!
Well it was not the ilk of the Christmas’ of Old. In fact I spent a good amount of my time alone and not feeling up to standard. This medication has me seeing through some kind of intellectual and spiritual fog. With the ill feeling, the alone time I managed to find myself in a small concoction of unhappiness. To be fair life has just not been going in any direction to my favour at all. However I managed to pull through it with a smile or two. Helped that Joel was down to spend some of the night hours with, not being able to shake this time schedule my body is limiting me to. Shit, I am having trouble concentrating on writing this. I have the focus of a frickin goldfish right now.
Christmas Eve Supper over at my brother’s In-laws was fantastic as per usual, but just not the same not having Dad around who ended up staying home due to adverse road conditions. Jeff and I managed to call up Oma (grandma) and Tante Lille (Auntie) which it was really nice to hear from. I must say I must have relly been a bad boy this year. I came into my first conflict trying to buy stuff for everybody as I have in richer years past, in fact spending to the critical limit of financial death. Then a few of my present’ee’s failed to even stop in while they were down to even recieve my giftage. So I guess i’m returning some shit to the store tomorrow. Myself, I recieved one present on Christmas. I am all about the giving, I don’t care about the recieving… but it kind of plays with my self confidence. Somebody putting thought into something is all I ever wanted, not extravagent gains. So I broke myself and recieved very little thought. In fact when Angela came home today, her family gave me more by leagues than family or friends. Hmmm….. I don’t know what to think about that.
So I have spent much time in this apartment. Thinking about the last year, I have came to the conclusion that i can’t wait till it’s over. I had enough of your rough clownpounding sodomy 2009, give me a break or at least some lube, FUCK! This barely felt like Christmas this year. Yeah I know i might be getting old and Christmas is supposed to be for kids…. but fuck that noise. I think on the old shenanigans, simple things like the intoxicated Christmas Light Cruising with my buddy of yore, Mr. Spoon. Worlds apart now, i wonder how he looks back upon such times. I have been looking around the empty streets for nostalgia and all I have been seeing is that nobody put any lights up this year. WTF? So back in the apartment i sit Cat-sitting staring at the one string we have above the window, playing way too much Assassins Creed 2 and thinking about what I should be doing instead. It doesn’t help that the cat and I seem to have a mutual hate-on for each other. However in the quiet moments, we managed to find a lonely comfort in each others company. I guess I just don’t have the same life habits as mommy kitty, get over it. So then I get meowed at and bitten on my fricken eyebrow when i’m trying to sleep. So out of my compassionate nature, there were no pillow case rides for the kitty, but I can dream. I was going to say I digress, but I am starting to wonder what my main point was. Meh
In retrospect this post makes me sound like a Whiny douche-bag. In fact this is the sort of post I hate from most people…. ooh, life is hard and sucks sometimes. Nark nark, the kitty and I aren’t getting along. Well looks like my blog integrity just committed suicide, somebody should notify the authorities so they might pick up the corpse. Oh wait, nobody reads livespace…ha ha, looks like the blog shall rot with the others. So in conclusion i wish upon you and yours a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year (screw that happy holiday shit). I hope you have your coffers full of fine ass Christmas Swank and Booty! Please feel free to tell me of your winnings and adventures, I could use a distraction right now. Also Joel was good enough to share an educational video with me to improve my relationship with Spitfire the kitty so we might make ammends over the holidays, so now I share it with you…..peace:
Reading: "Stone of Farewell" by Tad Williams
Listening To: "Ring of Fire (Johnny Cash Cover)" by H-Blockx
-L’M'B
Hey Ian. Keep the faith. Things are rough for quite a few people, it seems…but I wish you glad tidings just the same, and hope the year is better for you.
Thank you very much Sarah. I have managed to make myself feel a lot better. I just needed a little bit of venting. So I figured what else would a blog on livespace be for? I will make 2010 a better year through determination and persistence. Let\’s give it the ol college try, nark nark. Kudos, Listening to: " Baby Girl, I\’m A Blur" by Say Anything L\’M\’B
Hey man long time no speak. I was youtubing the other day and I ran across this video(I nearly died laughing). Sooo without further delay here is a link to the video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ipy58SaIRhsI was just going to mention if you\’re still on pogey you should seriously consider this second career thing man. They\’ll pay for a two year education at any post secondary facility of your choice.Hang in there Ian. 2009 was definately crap…things will get better. You just gotta keep fighting bud.
You\’re welcome, Ian. Will have to check out what you were listening to. I am going to start posting my listening habits on facebook…though right now I am listening to some verrrrry old Modest Mouse. And, I am teaching myself the cliched guitar classic by Led Zeppelin….its coming along nicely. Take care, eh?
Hi Ian. I always love your blogs. I was also thinking that last year was a crap year for me too. I am striving to make 2010 better in all ways imaginable. Just hope it goes according to plan. First and foremost is to find a full time job that I actually enjoy. Starting on Monday, I am also getting into contact with a few schools. Hopefully, my friend, 2010 will be better for both. Take care and, like me, keep your chin up.
Derek: That video is pretty awesomely packed with lame, thanks. As for the post secondary assistance I will be going down to the career center later this week and will definately bring it up. You have to keep all your options open! Thanks for the pep talk
Sarah: Well I am usually pretty honest about what i\’m listening to, even if it doesn\’t make me seem all that cool or edgey, i should be thankful I never get caught listening to Lady Gaga or some such dangerous reputation killer to my Metal rep. Thoh to be fair I am diverse in so many ways that I don\’t worry about shit like that in the first place. I just like making the jokes. My hope in tracking my listening habits is to perhaps inspire people to check out new things. By the way, Modest Mouse and getting your LED out at the same time is pretty epic!Nancy: Thank you for loving my blogs. I guess it is like having someone invest interest into my well being and makes me feel all tingly n shit! I wish you sucess in finding gainful employment. You and I both know very well now how nice it was to have our income and very far we could fall towards poverty. In spite of all that emotional, mental and physical garbage we had to go through to make it up there on the tundra, there was a lot of pay off…. in people and of course, cold hard loot. So towards the future we all travel, I wish us all the best of luck!Listening to: "Flower of Scotland" by Alestorm -L\’M\’B
Hey Ian…jeff played me about I cant even remember how many versions of that lame pokerface song, and cartmans version still gets me hotter than all the other ones! Your mixes are pretty great. I always come out of Jeff\’s pumpkin with more interesting stuff to listen to, and there are always more creepy youtube vids to check out…the night garden one that he showed Nick and I was pretty stellar…Led and MM- Yeah…I like to mix it up, and I dont like to pigeonhole myself into any single genre of music. Its all cool, though I long for the day when I can make my own meaningful noises…ah, dreams.
Ha ha… Looks Like Jeff enjoys my latest Revenge Disk. Then why does he choose to use it on his friends? In fact my appeciation for bad music apparently made him and Loralie fight (Not seriously I don\’t think) theone afternoon. Which is funny because I think Loralie is used to blocking out Jeff\’s Music but I suppose my Revenge will not be denied. The inside note is that me and a friend f mine have been having a war over finding bad music then listening to it together to enjoy each others pain when in fact our own is likely just as intense. Well we always have a laugh. I am not sure what "Night Garden" thing you are talking about. Well my brain is about to crap out so i\’m off to bed I think. Keep the tunes flowin out of that studio and maybe yet the noise will be realized
Listening To: "Rue Morgue Radio" by The Creepshow